"Dark Souls" is, however, far more than the story of her experiences. It also provides powerful step-by-step guidelines for those who are ready to begin dealing with narcissists and particularly to those who want to escape from their clutches, or better still avoid getting caught in the first place. I can recommend it as essential reading and I will certainly be recommending it to my clients here in Australia."

John B Nutting Clinical Counsellor, BA (Psych)

"Dark Souls is a must-read if you've ever been involved with an exploitative personality, and a recommended read even if you haven't. It examines in great depth who these personalities are, what makes them tick, and why they are so dangerous. Most importantly, it addresses, very effectively, how to avoid these insidious individuals and, if this is too late, how to recover from them. A welcome, important addition to the literature onviolating personalities."

Steve Becker, LCSW, CH.T Psychopathy Expert and LoveFraud.com columnist


"Engaging book from Sarah offering a look inside the minds of psychopaths and narcissists as well as the minds and emotional traits of the people that tend to be their victims, people who have oodles of empathy, tolerance and compassion but sadly have self-esteem issues themselves. She gives us a plethora of red flags to look for in terms of the psychopath`s and narcissist`s behaviour from her own personal experience and her own analysis. Sarah`s experience and thoughts are useful to read about in further identifying and learning more information about the pathological personalities of these "Dark Souls" and people`s difficulty and attachment to them. Her book further suggests to the reader useful coping mechanisms and ideas which are so important for a person finding themselves in this very difficult situation, a position where one can die a death of the spirit by hanging around too long with them."

Dr. Michael G Millett Ph.D Elevated Therapy International



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Interview with George Simon - Author of "In Sheeps Clothing" and "Character Disturbance"

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PLEASE NOTE: This website is dedicated to helping women and men who have been in abusive toxic relationships with Dark Souls or people suffering from Narcissistic Personality Disorder and/or Psychopathy. It is also likely to help anyone who has come out of an abusive relationship with an exploitive personality.


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Welcome to my website


Have you ever been in relationship with a person only to find that the person your thought you knew was someone completely different altogether ?

Have you been lied to consistently and yet 'you' felt like the one  who was 'crazy' trying to uncover why they behave the way that they do?

In Dark Souls - Healing and Recovering from Toxic Relationships - you may find some of your answers. 

It could be that the person you are in relationship with is  may be suffering from Narcissistic Personality Disorder and/or Psychopathy.

Important News

I will be doing a seminar on Dark Souls
on 31st January 2015. 

More information and tickets are available here:

Please ensure you book early in order to secure your place.



Dear Readers

Five years on from the writing Dark Souls and Pheonix Spirit I have decided to keep up this website for information purposes. You can use the relavant links on the page to Articles, Vidoes, blog links and the link pages which provide support.

I have also recently moved all the other articles that were originally posed on Waking you Up to the Articles page.

If you are in immediate danger please ensure you get professional help from the relevant authorities.  There are plenty of support links on the links page. 

With love, Sarah




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Mr Invinsible - the Invisible Psychpaths amongst us

In this website you will also find many resources to help you understand psychopaths, sociopaths, narcissists and Narcissistic Personality Disorder, along with my book Dark Souls - Healing and Recovering from Toxic Relationships.

Any type of person can be drawn to a Dark Soul usually because they are charismatic, charming and manipulative. However often their victims are Empaths. Why is this? Because they are able to mimic feelings and emotions that for us is genuine, but for them is a tool. And because they "appear" to be much like us, we think that they are also Empaths. Sadly nothing could be further from the truth!

“The Dark Soul is like an artist with a blank canvas, waiting for direction, who can mould and shape themself at will. They will appear to be anything you want them to be. They watch and wait for you to give him subtle clues, and direction before he picks up the brush and then he'll paint the perfect scene." 

When you meet a Dark Soul, what you see on the outside label, or the bottle, is NOT what is inside. It’s only when you drink it that you find out its poison.

No matter how long you have been with a Dark Soul, finding the strength to leave the relationships and recover from their toxic energy is not easy. Many victims feel helpless, worthless and often suicidal. Psychopathic predators will delight at taking anything from you; your money, possessions - and if they can get away with it, your soul.

You can read why I wrote Dark Souls Here

The Big Cosmic Joke

"The perfect pocket sized book to give to all your friends who think that everything is OK and right with this world - in time for Xmas"

Order The Big Cosmic Joke here  

Phoenix Spirit

For those readers who may have read every other book on psychopathy, narcissism or victims or abuse, there comes a point after being in a relationship with a disordered personality whereby they no longer want to be a victim or a survivor. Sarah Strudwick's second book "The Phoenix" takes the reader through her own journey 2 years post psychopath. She also uses the examples of other victims of abuse and explains why its so important to find the mythological part of ourselves in order that we can finally move on from abuse. The stories include those who have been able to move on and those who remain stuck. The book covers many topics from sorting out the devastating aftermath and mess we are often left with to trusting our own intuition in the future and exploring love again. With a guest chapter by best selling author Dr George Simon, author of "Character Disturbance", who discusses why therapy is useful for targets and why it may not be so helpful for those who have pathology. The Phoenix Spirit is a book for those who want to put all the abuse firmly behind them, whether they were a target who is struggling to move on, or someone who is thinking about inspiring others with their own stories, and wants to ultimately learn how to really move on and thrive again.x


Order "The Phoenix Spirit" available on Amazon




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A Practical Handbook on Psychopathic Personalities 

There are few books on Narcissistic Personality Disorder or Psychopaths, least of all how it feels to have been in relationship with one.

Healing from such damaging relationships takes time. Many people do not understand the complexities or the dynamics of these kinds of relationships which are primarily about sex, power and/or control. The Dark Soul is an abuser and he needs a willing victim who will enable him.

In Dark Souls - Healing and Recovering from Toxic Relationships, you will find tools that you can use to facilitate your own healing journey along with useful insights and carefully researched material to support the pathology of these people. It explores the many ways in which they are likely to manipulate us, the mind games, the lies and more importantly the reason they chose us in the first place. This book places direct responsibility on the victims to look at their own behaviour and ask themselves “why did this happen?” without going into blame and guilt.

Why am I so passionate about telling my own story and helping others to get out of denial and giving them the tools to heal that I did not have?

When I finally ended the relationships with my Ex I was left financially, emotionally and spiritually broken. Having spend years researching their condition with the help of wonderful professionals and experts trying to understand him and hoping he would change and "get it" the penny finally dropped and I "got it".

“Hindsite is a wonderful thing and if I have learnt anything from this experience, it is how to spot these predators before they spot me. The irony is had I written this book ten years ago I would never given him the time of day. My wish is that "Dark Souls" gives my readers the tools I never had.”


"If you've been involved with someone who seemed to be your dream come true, but turned out to suck all the energy, financial resources and happiness out of you, then Sarah Strudwick's new book, "Dark Souls: Healing and Recovering from Toxic Relationships" is worth reading. This book, written by a very well-informed survivor of a toxic relationship with a narcissistic sociopath, offers a wealth of information about the key symptoms of sociopathy and malignant narcissism; an inspiring tale of the author's personal journey of coping with a hellish relationship and her survival; information about other helpful books and resources that can help victims; and, last but not least, a dab of wry British humor to entertain you.


Dark Souls gets to the essence of what makes personality disordered individuals so predatory, ruthless and dangerous. It exposes their luring techniques, when such individuals seem to be perfect and adapt to your ideals. It reveals why this is only a mask to hide these social predators' real motives, which is to use and abuse others for their personal gain and amusement.


It explains the physiological and psychological manifestations of sociopathy and narcissism, exploring the reasons behind their shallowness of emotions that leads these predators to con, deceive, beguile, torment and sometimes physically harm others.


The book also examines, in an introspective and highly informative manner, the profile of their chosen targets: whom social predators tend to select and why. Although nobody is immune from victimization by sociopaths and narcissists, Strudwick indicates that these predators tend to pick the emphatic, vulnerable and needy out of the herd. She traces the root of this vulnerability to childhood upbringing, using her own life as an example. This doesn't mean, however, that their chosen victims are weak. The author also goes on to explain that sociopaths tend to target strong and principled victims.


They prefer individuals whom they initially regard as a challenge, later use as a false front and, when they are finally unmasked, who won't behave towards them as unscrupulously as they do (by lying, cheating and/or defrauding others).

While there are quite a few informative books on narcissism and sociopathy, "Dark Souls" still manages to bring a lot to the literature on the subject through its wit and spiritual perspective. This book uses the metaphor of the "dark soul" and the concept of spiritual energy to explain how psychopaths and narcissists drain our emotional energy as well as to point to a road of recovery and personal flourishing once we end these toxic relationships. "


Claudia Moscovici, psychopathyawareness